I discussed finding gratitude in sadness in my post two weeks ago, and so I thought I would pick up this next post continuing with the theme of gratitude. On January 1, I decided that my word for 2018 would be gratitude. As I talked about in my last post, in spite of the deep sadness that I have been feeling these past weeks, I have also felt this overwhelming sense of gratitude. When I am sad or disappointed, it is so easy for me to focus on all of the things that I don't have and to overlook all of the wonderful things that I do have. It felt like the right time in my life to pay attention to all that I have because I am so incredibly lucky in so many ways and for so many reasons.
So, I declare this year to be My Gratitude Project. My project is partially inspired by Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project, but mostly inspired by my need to recognize and remember the things that I am grateful for and to develop a more constant and consistent attitude of gratitude. It's not that I am an ungrateful person...I like to think of myself as very grateful, but if I am brutally honest about my mindset during a typical day, I probably spend the majority of my day caught up in checking off the items in my to do list, getting annoyed over the little things, and worrying about things that are often out of my control. I want to practice pausing more throughout the day and taking time to acknowledge the things that make me grateful.
If you are familiar with Gretchen Rubin, you know how organized and systematic her projects are. Although I greatly admire her structure and thorough research, that is not what this project is going to be simply because I am just not that organized. In fact, I just decided that I would start My Gratitude Project in the moment of writing this post over a cup of coffee in my favorite coffee shop. I honestly have no idea what this project will look like, but I do like Rubin's month by month format in The Happiness Project and Happier at Home. Because it happens to be the first month of a new year, I think it makes sense to reflect at the end of each month to see what has come up for me. So, instead of planning out themes and specific goals ahead of time, I am going to try to live each day with gratitude in the forefront of my mind and in the center of my heart, and see where it takes me.
So, why gratitude?
For me, gratitude brings happiness. When I think about the things I am grateful for, I am reminded how lucky I am, and this makes me feel happy.
In order to be grateful, I have to be present. Some of my lowest moments are when I am caught up in my worries, regrets, and fears. I worry about the future. I regret something that’s in the past. I fear something that may or may not happen. But when I focus on my gratitude, I pay attention to what I have right now in my life. My head and my heart have to be present. Right now, in this moment, why I am grateful? No matter how terrible my day is going or how awful I feel, I can always find a reason to be grateful.
Gratitude takes attention away from my worries, fears, complaints, and the things that I want but don't have. Instead, I focus on what I have (and I have a lot).
Gratitude and imperfection go together and complement each other. Appreciating what you have - regardless of all the flaws and imperfections and even embracing those imperfections and finding beauty in them - is gratitude.
I realize we are almost at the end of January, so let me share some of the things that I have been doing so far...
In the spirit of word of 2018, I started sharing pictures on Instagram almost every day of things that make me grateful. I use this platform as my own little gratitude journal. Anyone can check out some of the things that I am grateful for by visiting @TheHappyImperfectionist on Instagram. This mini-project has really helped me to notice the little things in my daily life that mean so much.
I have taken up journaling again. Over the last five years, I have been journaling off and on throughout each year. It's not something I do every day, but during parts of the year (especially the beginning of the year), it becomes part of my daily routine. When I take the time to write down my thoughts, I am much more tuned in to gratitude. Slowing down and reflecting helps me to pay closer attention to all of these wonderful things around me that bring me joy. Slowing down helps me to remember all the reasons why I am grateful.
I joined a program at my local yoga studio. Yoga used to be a huge part of my life, and since my daughter was born, I haven't carved out the time for it. One of my dear friends and yoga instructors started a month-long program that integrates yoga and personal inquiry, and it has been an incredible way to get myself back in the studio and immersed in their awesome community. It has also been an amazing way to help me connect and reflect during a difficult time. At the beginning of the program, our instructor asked us to make a commitment to ourselves. My commitment is to be grateful for what I have because I have so much to be grateful for.
Are you seeing a theme here? I literally think of gratitude in everything that I do these days, which has been so refreshing during a sad time in my life.
Gratitude helps me to stay connected to all that I love in my life, and it inspires me to live a fuller life.
2018 is my year of gratitude.
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